Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy

Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy by Matthew Kelly

We all lead busy lives. My husband often points out to me that I need to slow down. It’s funny how rushing around seemed normal to me, but my husband was quick to see how it was negatively affecting me. To be fair, my rushing around is kind of obvious, given the fact that I can be clumsy. I would literally try to cut corners and end up running into a wall.

When I heard of the book Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy by Matthew Kelly, I knew it was a book I needed to read. I enjoy reading Catholic books, as they are often a catalyst in my prayer life.

I was gifted the book for my birthday, and I started reading it right away. I actually fell ill with a bad cold right around my birthday, so reading was a great way to spend my time. The book really couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. To be honest, sometimes I don’t mind being sick, because it gives me a good reason to rest; I allow myself to rest without feeling guilty. However, being sick can still be frustrating, especially when I have the motivation to do things but physically can't.

I saw a meme once that really resonated with me on this topic: “God allowed me to experience X because He knew otherwise I’d be too powerful.” Replace X with an ailment or shortcoming. Sometimes I say this to myself when I get sick or am low on energy or get a migraine because it reminds me that I am human, and I’m not meant to do everything. I have to rely on God, and I am not God.

What I’m getting at is that “only resting when you’re sick” is a very bad mindset to have. I recognized this, but being busy is so engrained in our culture, that I was comfortable staying in this mindset. I mean, it seemed to have worked out for me so far. I love a sense of accomplishment. But deep down I know that thinking isn’t sustainable, and it’s not a life that God envisioned for us.

Matthew Kelly’s book took a deep dive into why God does not want us to fill out time with busyness. While Kelly’s writing can often sound redundant to me, I appreciated him emphasizing this point. I needed to hear it. Again, we are so used to being busy, we take that as normal and don’t realize there is a better alternative.

One of my favorite chapters of Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy was about building margin into your life. It means to not pack your day so full that it leaves no time for any rest or anything that might come up. I have tried to incorporate this into my day more, even just by waking up 15 minutes earlier every day. I would often feel rushed in the morning taking my dog on a walk and making a filling breakfast and getting ready before work. Just having the extra 15 minutes drastically reduces my anxiety levels.

He also talked about observing the Sabbath, and how we need to make a day of rest a priority. Rest doesn’t need to mean sitting around all day. Rather, it means doing something you enjoy that isn’t work.

I wish Kelly went into more practical detail about what we can remove from our lives when prioritizing slowing down, as one of his points was that we must accept that we cannot accomplish everything we want to. I feel like I spend so much time taking care of things, especially our house. And it’s not like I shouldn’t attend to my house. I also think it would have been key to point out that it isn’t just time we are managing, but energy. I personally never wish for more hours in the day; I just wish for more energy to do all the things I wanted to do in those 24 hours (but I guess slowing down and resting would help with that!).

Recently I’ve been working to try to set limits on my work and activities. For example, when I create reels for my @fields_fertilityed Instagram page, I limit myself to one or two takes. I also limit myself on how many social posts I make. This seems hypocritical to me since I work in marketing for my day job.

But social media is such a double-edged sword. I want to connect with people on social and have potential clients see the person behind Fields Fertility Education. However, I know I’m already on social media too much, and I know it’s not my main source for gaining new clients. Especially since my full-time job is in marketing, I would rather spend my time, when working on Fields Fertility Education, helping clients or creating other resources. (So, if you follow me on Instagram and if I’m not always posting, just know that I’m here behind the scenes! I love working with my clients and can always be reached by email!)

All in all, I think Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy is a wonderful read for people who find themselves rushing through life, which is honestly probably a lot of us. When we slow down, we can be more present, grateful, and happy. I wanted to write this blog because whenever I have free time, I am constantly ruminating on what I should do with my time. I’m wanting to figure out the best or most meaningful use of my time. As Kelly wrote in his book, us humans were designed for love. So, if we are ever unsure of how we should spend our time, if we are showing love to others, then it’s a good use of our time.